So...who else is being sued?

Is it just me?

I've been wanting to write this post for weeks, and I've noticed this is an acceptable place to vent, so consider this my turn.

I'd been separated from my ex for four years by the time our divorce went through this past October. There were several reasons why it took so long, none of which are that important. I was awarded sole custody of the daughter we have together, and he never formally adopted my older daughter. My little one went for her first weekend with him after the divorce was settled (mid-October) and when he dropped her off he informed me he'd talked to her about him getting remarried on Halloween. He said, "I told her so that she would get used to the idea of having another mother."

I didn't like the way he worded it, so I sat down with her to talk and make sure she was okay. In the process of which I said to her, "You know if anything's ever on your mind or bothering you, all you have to do is talk to me. That's what I'm here for." She promptly took me to her room for privacy, stating that what she had to say was embarassing.

Here's where I'll sum up, because the whole thing makes me ill and I prefer to get through it fast. My little one told me daddy had touched her, in a way she knew wasn't right. She also told me he'd done it to her sister. After I could breathe again, I had her leave the room and called my older daughter in. And I asked in very general ways if what I'd just been told by her sister was true. She burst into tears, and then confirmed it was.

I went right to the police, who told me to get an order of protection first thing. Which I went and filed for the next day. It was denied and a hearing was set. The girls had to be interviewed, physically examined, and social services got involved. When the hearing finally came up, I went to court alone. The bastard ex was there with his fiancee, and he had a lawyer. I knew right away his mother must have paid for that, as he's happily unemployed and trying to get on disability. It should come as no surprise that his lawyer proceeded to accuse me of making the whole thing up and wanted the order of protection dismissed. Thankfully he didn't get his way.

This is all still on-going. The girls have both been in counseling since all this started, I've been accused more than once of making the whole thing up, older daughter is failing classes at school and little one is acting out by lying a lot. They just want all of it over with, and so do I.

But a new wrinkle was just recently added. The bastard ex's mother is now suing me for grandparent visitation rights. When all this started I called her to try to reassure her that despite what was happening I still wanted her to be a part of little one's life, because they've always been very close. Little one used to go to her house and stay every other weekend. I didn't want things to change for them, and I tried on several occasions to make that clear to her. But the day after the lawyer ripped me apart in court I called her, simply to ask why she had hired a lawyer for him. She explained her side of it, then began to get very upset with me. I tried to calm her down by once again saying I didn't want everything that was going on to come between her and my daughter, but she was having none of it. She began screaming at me that it was all too hard for her to believe so she just didn't know if she could believe it and so on until I finally got tired of listening to her rant and hung up. That was the last time she and I spoke. She has called her a few times, but has only spoken to Rosalie. She's claiming she tried to work all this out with me but I denied her. It's all a bunch of lies, every statement in the paperwork, so I'm not exactly worried.

Not worried....but definitely disgusted. Every time I spoke with her she would cry and complain about not sleeping and not eating and being stressed, and I would patiently listen, even though I wanted to rant at her because she hasn't been the only one suffering. I know she feels a lot of guilt, because some of the incidents happened at her house while the ex was living with her. And I know she might feel like she failed somehow because he is her son. But through it all I have to wonder when she has stopped to think about the children, if at all.

Suing me is certainly not going to solve a thing, it has only served to generate some pretty strong hatred in me for her. Because no matter the outcome to all of this, the fact that she took such a drastic and frankly idiotic step will never fade for me.

Okay. I think I'm done now. Thanks for reading this far.

Wow...just........wow. PM to follow. But for now... *supergigantoatomic hugs*

Oh honey, I'm so very sorry! I can't even imagine having to go through all of that!

Feel free to vent any time, we're all familiar with that need!

*HUGHUGHUGHUG*

Words cannot adequately express the shock and anger I have towards your ex. I hope everything works out in your favor. Know that we will always provide a shoulder to cry on or a hand to hold or sympathetic ear. Whatever you need, don't hesitate to ask.

Well for now all I need is to have an outlet for how I'm feeling. It was a relief to write my first post, just to get it out. Trying to deal with all this on my own has been failing miserably. I put on a happy face whenever I'm with the girls, and try to make everything as normal as I possibly can. I'm not trying to pretend it never happened, but I am trying to show them that life can still be okay.

That game plan has been helping them a lot, but in the meanwhile I've been getting a bit more depressed everyday. It honestly takes every ounce of self-control I have not to drive out to his house and show him what a eunuch is.

There was a bit of good news yesterday, however. My brother in law has offered to pay for a lawyer. So now not only do we have a lawyer for the ridiculous lawsuit filed by grandma, we also have one for the order of protection. Just knowing we have someone fighting for our side has alleviated a lot of stress and worry.

Will keep updating, if for no other reason than to put the poison of all this somewhere outside of myself.

Wow... not sure what to say.


If you need me hon, you know where to find me.