You knew it was going to happen eventually...

I think the Twilight series would irk me less if it had stayed a tween trend. What I find most annoying (and a bit disturbing) is how popular it became with older married women. When your tween child comes home from school and tells you she almost got detention from her teacher for making fun of Twilight, something is wrong. These women would get better results if they traded in their Edward/Jacob t-shirts for one that reads, "My husband can't find my clitoris. Please send help!"

I haven't read the books. I don't intend to read the books. Ever. Browsing through a couple chapters online was enough for me to know it wasn't for me. I was forced to sit through the first movie. I don't intend to see it again, or any others for that matter. (I do, however, wish I could get paid the big bucks to stutter, make stupid faces, and stare blankly like Kristen Stewart.)

I just content myself with the fact that soon enough the whole stupid fad will die a "vegetarian", baseball-playing, sparkling in the sunlight death.

Thank you, Gen. You illustrated perfectly what's most wrong with Twilight.

This comic right here pretty much sums up my feelings on Twilight. That and Applegeeks is funny.

ZombieJoe wrote:While not a fan of Twilight, there is a flaw in your argument. Sunlight killing vampires is not a constant. Dracula was written to become weak in sunlight losing most of his power, but was not killed by it.

Ah. I never knew that. Still...we'll say most Vampire mythology says that sunlight kills them. And it still doesn't take away from the fact that Meyer turned Vampires into a bunch of sniveling, whiny, emo-boys with a penchant for sparkly lotion and chapstick.

I watched the first film out of morbid curiosity. I avoided the subsequent film(s). And I haven't read the books because I'm, y'know, an adult. And male. The biggest crime of the film was that it was dull. Vampires are the risen dead, compelled to drink the blood of the living, damned to eternal night, hated and feared by those that once loved them. Twilight made that concept boring. It's like the Transformers films - how can a movie with giant robots that can turn into other mechanical objects induce such yawns?

edit: Although I do find it difficult to hate the lead actors. When the last film came out, I heard a segment on the radio where the hosts were stating that when they're interviewed, they gush over the film & author. When the cameras & mikes are off, both actors go on about how the movies suck, how much they regret signing the contracts, and that Stephanie Myer is fucking crazy.

I'm one of those weirdos that don't love or hate the twilight stuff.


I DO think obsessed twilight moms are ridiculous. I DO think the sparkly thing is STUPID. But I can sit through it without wanting to gouge my own eyes out.

Chubbalumpakis wrote:

ZombieJoe wrote:While not a fan of Twilight, there is a flaw in your argument. Sunlight killing vampires is not a constant. Dracula was written to become weak in sunlight losing most of his power, but was not killed by it.

Ah. I never knew that. Still...we'll say most Vampire mythology says that sunlight kills them. And it still doesn't take away from the fact that Meyer turned Vampires into a bunch of sniveling, whiny, emo-boys with a penchant for sparkly lotion and chapstick.

Well, Anne Rice did half the work on that one.

Most of the vampire tv shows and movie follow the sunlight kills thing. the only ones i can think of that didn't do that are twilight and moonlight.

KS, the biggest one is Bram Stokers Dracula. The book that most of this plays off of.

For anyone if you want a taste of what vampires that Stoker wrote about are like with a little commentary on what they have become, read Blood Groove by Alex Bledsoe. Takes a vampire from WWII era and brings him back in 1975 Memphis.